once upon a time a great war ravaged the kingdom of a—————.
hunger, disbanded soldiers, and demons escaped from hell and wandered the countryside.
also wandering wandering the countryside was a beautiful young princess, whose castle had been sacked and burned by one of the passing armies.
the king, the queen, her sisters, and her little dog had all perished or been lost in the confusion, but she had hopes of finding the little dog, at least.
the princess had not eaten since finding a few pine cones by the roadside a few days earlier, and she was hungry.
she hoped to find a sorcerer or a good witch or a genie who would grant her some wishes, or at least a few more pine cones or some grass to chew on.
she came to a crossroads. there had been a sign there indicating the various directions that could be taken but it had been stolen or torn down.
the princess took one of the roads as they were all the same.
darkness began to fall.
a mile down the road she encountered a pirate, an ogre, and a dwarf, standing around, and tending to, a small fire. a small pot was suspended above the fire, but no fragrant odors, or any kind of odors , emanated from it.
the princess wondered if the ill-assorted trio might wish to chop her up and put her in the pot.
instead the dwarf, who had a round red face, addressed her in a cheery manner, as if he did not have a care in the world.
look here , he said to the princess, we are attempting to make some pea soup, but so far all our efforts have been thwarted. perhaps you can help out?
how might i do that? the princess replied politely.
we need some peas, the pirate growled,
or at least a pea, the ogre added in a sad solemn tone.
i am sorry but i do not happen to have any peas on my person, the princess answered.
ah, but you might still be able to help us out, the dwarf told her.
i am at your service, the princess said, provided that i get to share in the pea soup if and when it is produced.
of course, the ogre said, what do you take us for?
very well, then, how may i assist you?
there is an old woogle woman living in a hut down the road, the dwarf said. we believe she has some peas, but we have not been able to persuade her to part with even one.
or to admit that she has any, the pirate added.
we thought you might have better luck, the ogre said, being somewhat younger and more personable than ourselves.
that is all very well and i appreciate the compliment and your confidence in me, the princess replied. but , tell me, what exactly is a woogle woman? is she something like a witch?
she is the opposite of a foogle woman, the dwarf said.
she is neither a fox nor a hen, said the ogre, if you get my drift.
this is all very well, said the pirate, but the only thing that need concern us is that she might have some peas, or at least one pea, with which we might make some soup. so are you game?
i do not see that i have anything to lose, said the princess. in what direction is her hut?
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